Shidduch: How to Find Your Other Half and Build a Strong Jewish Family

Finding a life partner is one of the most important and exciting stages in every person's life. In Jewish tradition this process is called a "shidduch," and it calls for a thoughtful approach, prayer, and trust in the Almighty. So how do you choose your other half wisely and build a strong Jewish family?

Choosing a partner is not simply finding someone you like the look of. It is finding a person with whom you can build a shared life founded on common values, respect and love.

• Fear of Heaven (Yirat Shamayim): The aspiration to live according to Jewish law and tradition, respect for the Torah and the mitzvot.
• Honesty and integrity: It is important that the young man is honest with you and with those around him, keeps his promises and is reliable.
• Kindness and compassion: The ability to empathize, to help others and to show mercy.
• Respect: Respect for you, your family, your views and beliefs.
• Responsibility: Readiness to take responsibility for his actions and for his family.
• Diligence: A drive for self-development and achieving goals.
• Good character (Middot Tovot): Patience, self-restraint, the ability to forgive and to find compromise.

Qualities that matter in a young woman:

• Fear of Heaven (Yirat Shamayim): As with a young man, this is the foundation of Jewish life.
• Modesty (Tzniut): Outer and inner modesty, respect for oneself and for others.
• Kindness and compassion (Chessed): Readiness to help others and to show care.
• Respect: Respect for her husband, his family and his opinion.
• Wisdom and good judgment: The ability to make balanced decisions and to give wise advice.
• Homemaking skills: The ability to create comfort and keep order in the home.
• Good character (Middot Tovot): Patience, self-restraint, the ability to forgive and to find compromise.

Prayers to bring a shidduch closer. Prayer is a powerful tool that helps us draw closer to the Almighty and ask Him for help. Here are a few basic prayers a young woman can say to bring her shidduch closer:

• Tehillim (Psalms): Especially Psalms 32, 38, 70, 121 and 124. Reciting Tehillim is a traditional way to turn to God with a request.
• The prayer "Ana BeKoach": This prayer is considered very powerful and helps in various situations, including the search for a shidduch.
• Personal prayers: The most important thing is sincere prayer that comes from the heart. Tell the Almighty about your wishes and hopes, ask Him to guide you onto the right path and to help you find your other half.

In today's world, when technology plays a major role in our lives, many people use social networks, Instagram among them, to meet people and look for a partner. But it is important to keep Jewish values and principles in mind when using these platforms.

How to use Instagram to look for a shidduch:

• A dignified profile: Design your page with taste and modesty, in the spirit of tzniut – your photos and posts should reflect your values.
• Themed communities: Follow Jewish communities and the pages of shadchanim – it is easier to meet people there who share your goals and way of life.
• Serious intentions: Before continuing the conversation, make sure the person is genuinely set on building a family and not on a casual acquaintance.
• From messaging to a real introduction: Do not drag out the conversation in direct messages. If there is mutual interest, move the acquaintance onto an official track – through a shadchan or an introduction of the families.
• Caution with personal information: Do not rush to share your address, phone number or details of your personal life with people you barely know.